Godly Friendships

Godly friendships and spiritual progress

It is easy to feel trapped by our bad habits. We don’t like certain behavioral patterns that have become habitual, and we feel helpless in our attempt to change. Growing as Christians is often fraught with failure, and we find ourselves stuck. Our spiritual progress feels more like a treadmill, only seemingly moving forward, yet noticing the scenery is remaining the same.

Sometimes the only way to move forward is to commit to changing our environment. If we have friendships that keep us from growing, perhaps it is time to leave those friendships behind. Back in the 1960’s I hung around with a group of friends, in Berkeley, California, where we’d gather in a coffee house, talking about the poetry books we were going to publish, and the novels we were going to write, but all we did was talk. One young man shocked the rest of us one day by announcing he was no longer going to come to the coffee house. He’d decided it was just a waste of time. If he was ever going to make something of himself, he had to make the break. He told us he wanted to go to medical school, and was therefore planning to put all his energy in completing his college degree with the best grades he could possibly get. We all tried to convince him that he could accomplish all of that without abandoning the coffee house scene, but he wasn’t convinced. That was the last evening he’d ever join the rest of us.

His decision haunted me, for deep down I knew he was right. My life was going nowhere, and I was feeling increasingly unfulfilled, both spiritually and intellectually. Within six months I made the decision to move to Portland, Oregon, for a fresh start. Abandoning those friends was the best decision I could have made, for none of us was motivated to go beyond that little coffee house ghetto we’d created for ourselves.

Sometimes the only way to make the changes in our lives that are needed for spiritual growth is to walk away from relationships that are keeping us stuck. As Christians, it does make a difference who we hang out with. If we have friendships with individuals who are simply not interested in things of a spiritual nature, we will find yourself wasting precious moments in our journey to God.

Having friendships with fellow Christians is the only way we can keep ourselves centered in Christ. If we want to deepen our faith, we need to spend time with people who desire the very same thing. We can build a strong relationship with Christ by spending time with people whose values are the same. If we waste our time with people who are only pursuing worldly pleasures, we’ll end our life doing the same. The time God has allotted us must not be squandered. If we keep company with people whose goals are of a spiritual nature, and whose lives are centered in Christ, our goals will be the same, and we will grow as Christians, together.

With love in Christ,
Abbot Tryphon

Friday January 13, 2017 / December 31, 2016
30th Week after Pentecost. Tone four.
Sviatki. Fast-free
Apodosis of the Nativity of Christ.
Venerable Melania the Younger, nun, of Rome (439).
New Hieromartyr Michael priest (1937).
Martyr Peter (1938).
Holy Confessor Dositheus, metropolitan of Zagreb (1941).
St. Peter Mogila, metropolitan of Kiev (1646).
Venerable Gelasius, monk, of Palestine.
Venerable Gaius, monk.
Venerable Theophylactus of Ochrid (1126).
Ten Virgin-martyrs of Nicomedia (Greek).
Venerable Zoticus of Constantinople, feeder of orphans (4th c.) (Greek).
St. Anysius, bishop of Thessalonica (406).
Venerable Sabiana, Abbess of the Samtskhe Monastery (11th c.).
Martyrs Busiris, Gaudentius and Nemo (Greek).

The Scripture Readings

Hebrews 11:8

Faithful Abraham

8 By faith Abraham obeyed when he was called to go out to the place which he would receive as an inheritance. And he went out, not knowing where he was going.

Hebrews 11:16

16 But now they desire a better, that is, a heavenly country. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for He has prepared a city for them.

Mark 12:1-12

The Parable of the Wicked Vinedressers

12 Then He began to speak to them in parables: “A man planted a vineyard and set a hedge around it, dug a place for the wine vat and built a tower. And he leased it to vinedressers and went into a far country. 2 Now at vintage-time he sent a servant to the vinedressers, that he might receive some of the fruit of the vineyard from the vinedressers. 3 And they took him and beat him and sent him away empty-handed. 4 Again he sent them another servant, and at him they threw stones, wounded him in the head, and sent him away shamefully treated. 5 And again he sent another, and him they killed; and many others, beating some and killing some.6 Therefore still having one son, his beloved, he also sent him to them last, saying, ‘They will respect my son.’ 7 But those vinedressers said among themselves, ‘This is the heir. Come, let us kill him, and the inheritance will be ours.’ 8 So they took him and killed him and cast him out of the vineyard.

9 “Therefore what will the owner of the vineyard do? He will come and destroy the vinedressers, and give the vineyard to others.10 Have you not even read this Scripture:

‘The stone which the builders rejected
Has become the chief cornerstone.
11 This was the Lord’s doing,
And it is marvelous in our eyes’?”

12 And they sought to lay hands on Him, but feared the multitude, for they knew He had spoken the parable against them. So they left Him and went away.